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วันศุกร์ที่ 12 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

UFO: Where Did the Man on No Name Moon Hide in 1969?

Some questions keep bugging me.

For example, when I was five years old in 1937, what caused the blimp Hindenburg to explode terrifying that radio announcer at Amherst, New Jersey?

(See the video at: http://www.vidicom-tv.com/tohiburg.htm)

And when my dad was twelve years old in 1912, why didn't the Titanic hit the iceberg head-on and save the ship?

(Go to: http://octopus.gma.org/space1/titanic.html to learn in short-form the details of the Titanic.)

My main question is: When our firstborn son was 12 years old in 1969, where did the Man on No Name Moon hide during our lunar explorations starting July 20, 1969?

(Go to: http://www.hq.nasa.gov/office/pao/History/ap11ann/introduction.htm to read about the 30th Anniversary of the first landing.)

I heard a shuffling behind my chair. A girl's voice said, "They were stupid to use hydrogen."

It was Xrytspet again. I said, "Scram, Xrytspet!"

"Well, they were. They should have used helium."

I said, "Xrytspet, they would have used helium if they had helium. I've figured that they made it 99.99988789% of the way across the Atlantic. Round that off and they made it!"

"Tell that to the charred ashes of those who were in the 0.00012%."

I try not to laugh when Xrytspet is serious.

I said, "What caused the explosion; any analysis report from Fanton in G10009845788899990766?"

She flashed her lovely yellow eyes and said, "On the Net?"

"I'm always on the Internet when I'm writing. You know that, Xrytspet."

"Let me get up to that keyboard."

She pushed me aside and I plopped down into a pile of papers. She ignored my plight and typed a zillion miles an hour.

I tried to catch the code, but I'm not a super speed camera.

The screen went blank and the printer sent out a single sheet of paper. Before I could grab it, she hid it behind her back.

She said, "It was a spark!"

I said, "Give me that you little liar!"

She laughed and handed it to me. It read: xpffpt swrivtllssswaa flgzzzrffphll English translation for Taylor Jones, the hack writer, "It was a spark!" signed Silzrack.

I said, "What about the man on No Name Moon?"

Xrytspet said, "What about the Titanic?"

I said, "I know about the Titanic. If the captain had known that it would be disastrous to skim past that iceberg rather than hitting it head-on, that is exactly what he would have done."

"He should have slowed when he got the iceberg reports."

"We all know that, Xrytspet. The man on No Name Moon?"

She said, "There is no man on No Name Moon. You are just a child!"

At least she didn't call me an idiot like she usually did.

I said, "My mother showed me the man on No Name Moon. Are you calling my mother a liar?"

Xrytspet said, "Let's hop into the FnL7 Time Craft."

That's when it dawned on me that Silzrack had signed the communication from Fanton in G10009845788899990766.

The speed of light was nothing to these Fantonians.

Xrytspet said, "It is surprising to an earthbound idiot."

I said, "You don't have to read my mind and you don't have to call me an idiot."

She said, "Oh! Was that you I was talking about?"

The FnL7 Time Craft didn't puff the dust of No Name Moon but my feet did.

For some reason I could not feel the heat and I could breath. I said, "Any reason why I'm not dead?"

She said, "Tee Hee!"

I said, "Are you going to answer my question?"

"When you get into the FnL7 Time Craft you are turned into a robot. Robots don't feel heat or cold."

"Last time you told me you were frozen when you traveled in space. So, where am I then, if I'm not here?"

"Back on Earth writing that stupid article. See, there is nobody here on No Name Moon but us chickens!"

Copyright©John T. Jones, Ph.D. 2005




John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com), a retired college professor and business executive, Former editor of an international engineering magazine. To learn more about Wealthy Affiliate University go to his info site. If you desire a flagpole to Fly Old Glory, go to the business site.

More info: http://www.InternetBusinessToolCenter.com

Business web site: http://www.AAAFlagpoles.com

วันพฤหัสบดีที่ 11 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

วันพุธที่ 10 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

Winning Hack Yahoo Hack Day 2007

This is a video of the Winning hack that won at BBC Yahoo Hack Day London 2007. Micheal Young and Nick Bilton. The New York Times R&D Lab.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYSNquzg70E&hl=en

วันอังคารที่ 9 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

I Talk with Herman the Hermit: How to Tell if You are Atheistic?

Folks are always having their faith shaken.

They look at the typhoons, ulcers, bedbug bites, wars, pestilence, and television and say, "God would not put up with all this crap."

I decided to have a chat with Herman Volker Hilton. I heard that the famous hermit was thinking about becoming an atheist and worth looking for. I figured that I could sell any article that came from the interview to Confirmed and Nearly Confirmed Atheists Magazine.

In fact it was the editor of that magazine, Peter Moses Isaac Aaron Greenburg, who gave me Herman's whereabouts.

Before I left the editor's office he said, "Whatever you do, don't tell him I sent you and don't ask him for one of his beers either. He's on Baker Island."

I looked in the CIA's World Fact Book to see exactly where the atoll was. It's halfway between Hawaii and Australia. I thought, That should be easy to find.

Baker Island is uninhabited since they stopped mining the bat poop, or guano as they say in New Mexico. It's a wildlife refuge operated by the Department of the Interior. (It's just like the U.S. Government to have the Department of the Interior stick its nose into the Department of the Exterior's business.)

The Island gets a couple of official visits each year. The Coast Guard and the Department of Interior take turns.

When I got to Baker Island, I found Herman stark naked sitting on a log looking out over the Pacific. His fine red beard was down to his belly, so I figured he'd been there for a while.

He was smoking a corncob pipe and seven bottles of Sam Adams® were cooling in a tub of ice next to him, each bottle within easy reach.

Herman wasn't expecting Taylor Jones, the hack writer, despite the fact that I can show up anywhere that sparks my interest.

He looked up at me with those steel blue eyes and said, "Who in all of God's creations are you? Where did you come from?
Wherever that is, GO BACK!"

I apologized: "Sorry to have startled you, Herman. I hope you didn't spill too much beer."

"There are only two of us on this godforsaken atoll. Who introduced us?"

I was glad that Herman the Hermit had a sense of humor. I decided it was best to lie and said, "I decided to canoe over here from Howland Island. I'm doing a story on Amelia Gerhardt. I though I might find her aircraft here." I decided it better not to mention the editor of Confirmed and Nearly Confirmed Atheists Magazine.

He stood up and pointed back towards the abandoned airstrip. "Look in the brush back there."

I was ecstatic.

He had found her airplane!

I would be famous if I could get back to civilization with color photographs.

I snapped a couple of shots of Herman with my trusty C-3® camera and ran and ran and ran.

Then I looked and looked and looked. I heard a gasoline engine and found that it ran an electrical generator hooked to a refrigerator. I looked in and the fridge was nearly full of Sam Adams®. I didn't dare snitch a beer. I took a bottle of water.
Finally, I decided that I needed more information to find the plane. I walked back in the white-hot, blazing sun to find Herman.

When I found him, he was fishing in the surf. He said, "I figured you would be hungry when you get back. Grab a piece of fish off that hot rock. Don't mess with my beer. I see you've already stolen a bottle of my water."

I sat on my haunches. I learned to do that during the Korean War. You could tell how long a G.I. had been in Korea by how low on his haunches he could sit. The Koreans could put their butts all the way down to the ground. I make it about half way on these old knees.

I drank the water and ate the fish and said, "Couldn't find it?"

He said, "Find what?"

"Amelia's airplane. You said to look--"

"Did I tell you that I had seen the airplane?"

"No."

"Did I tell you that the airplane was in the bushes by the airstrip?"

"Well, no. But you said--"

He had a big fish on and didn't say anything until he had pulled the flipping thing up on the beach. He went crazy. He said, "That's a new personal best!"

I said, "It's what?" He hadn't been away as long as I though he had.

He ignored my comment and gutted the fish. I knew he had jived me about the personal best thing.

Herman studied the stomach contents of the fish with great detail and said, "Look! The famine is going to end."

I said, "That's good news. What famine? You learned that from looking at fish guts?"

"Our famine! We have fish to eat."

I gave him my best look of credulous despair.

He said, "You were assuming again! You'd think you would learn something after almost dieing of heat prostration tramping around on this godforsaken island in this white-hot, tropical sun."

I decided to try to at least salvage my original article idea. I said, "Looks like a storm is brewing. I've got a friend that says that God causes storms, war, and pestilence."

He said, "What storm? What has a storm to do with war and pestilence?"

He had me there.

There was no storm brewing.

Now he was suspicious. That's when he said, "You can blame God for storms and pestilence if you want to, but what good will it do you? It's better to learn what really causes storms and pestilence just like it is good to know what causes smallpox and polio. Then you can do something about it."

I had to agree so I nodded my head. He said, "As for war, like television, that can only be blamed on man."

Well, I didn't have an article. Herman had mentioned God three times. But I was determined to do something of great significance for God and mankind. Herman had inspired me.

The human gnome project is completed.

I decided to look for life on Europa. When I got home, I would call Xrytspet from Fanton in G10009845788899990766.

Pop! There was Xrytspet. She said, "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get off this godforsaken atoll with its white-hot, tropical sun."




John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com), a retired college professor and business executive, Former editor of an international engineering magazine. To learn more about Wealthy Affiliate University go to his info site. If you desire a flagpole to Fly Old Glory, go to the business site.

More info: http://www.InternetBusinessToolCenter.com

Business web site: http://www.AAAFlagpoles.com

วันจันทร์ที่ 8 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

new Working Crossfire Hack.FREE

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วันอาทิตย์ที่ 7 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

วันเสาร์ที่ 6 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

COOLEST AND EASIEST HACK FOR COD ( 4 - 5 - 6 )

THIS IS THE BEST HACK FOR COD THERE IS !!!! WATCH CAREFULLY AND FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS !!!



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHXgLrfLYmc&hl=en

วันศุกร์ที่ 5 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

วันพฤหัสบดีที่ 4 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

วันอังคารที่ 2 มีนาคม พ.ศ. 2553

I Can't Write Jokes but You Can Become a Standup Comic

This is Taylor Jones, the hack writer.

I'm a prolific writer of much needed articles.

I wrote from scratch most of the over 150 articles I've posted on http://www.ezinearticles.com during the last two months.

Okay, so some were not much needed, but over 15,000 folks have visited the articles along with over 100 ezine publishers.

It's true. I can write on any subject.

What I can't do is write jokes.

I've tried to learn the craft.

I can't.

However, I did find a website that might get you started in writing jokes and could even get you paid in applause, or even money, by doing standup comedy. The site is http://www.soyouwanna.com/site/minis/mini/standupMINI/standupMINI2.html.

Good Luck!

I'm sure you will become famous.

If you do, maybe you can drop me off a ticket to one of your shows when you make the big-time and perform in Southern Idaho.

We live in the Banana Belt of Idaho. Kids and adults here leave there coats at home if the temperature gets over 25 degrees.

The other night we took our Idaho grandkids to dinner. The four-year-old had a sweater but no coat.

I said, "Bob, where is your coat?"

She said, "Home."

I think the temperature was about 7 degrees.

Bob is a Girl. Her given name is not Bob. About a year ago she said, "My name is Bob!"

Now nobody dares call her anything else.

Kids say the funniest things as Art Linkletter use to say.

My aunt was on his show. She was the oldest mother in the United States with the youngest baby.

That would be my cousin, Billy.

Where in the heck are you, Billy?

When my daughter-in-law had triplets up in Washington State, our four-year-old granddaughter said, "I've got a new sister and she has two brothers."

We went to a recital after dinner. I was afraid that everybody was going to freeze to death (especially Bob).

It was so cold that the red banner around the Sizzler® sign turned blue.

I've often wondered why the lettering saying "Sizzler®" is not colored RED rather than a cold color like blue or green, whichever it is.

Well, how hot was your steak by the time the girl brought it to you?

Do they call thatTruth in Advertising?

I've only bought one steak at Sizzler®.

I ordered "medium rare" and they brought me "medium horsehide."

If it wasn't cold when I got it, it sure was when I nailed it to my boot.

I like to go to Sizzler®. I've learned to order the salmon.

The salmon is served with rice pilaf and that yummy Texas toast.

You can get the soup, salad, and dessert bar for an extra buck.

I think I told you that my aortic valve is from a pig.

I'm grateful for that pig. I have a little stuffed pig on top of my monitor. He is pink. He wares a biker's jacket that says "Harley Davidson." If I have chest pains again, he will hop on his bike and get the hell out of here.

Do you have those little Windows® pop-ups while you are typing?

Mine just said,Your virus protection has been updated.

The computer techs can hardly keep up with the new viruses.

Sometimes one will pop up and say The Kiddlelooper Virus is an insidious worm that enters your computer and erases your hard drive if you turn your computer off after reading your email and then turn it back on again.

The last time I turned off my computer was 1963.

Well, I have to go now.

The wind just blew my horse over.




John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com), a retired college professor and business executive, Former editor of an international engineering magazine. To learn more about Wealthy Affiliate University go to his info site. If you desire a flagpole to Fly Old Glory, go to the business site.

More info: http://www.InternetBusinessToolCenter.com

Business web site: http://www.AAAFlagpoles.com